Wednesday, August 17, 2011

1200 Above Sea Level

1200m Above Sea Level Slideshow: Azizah’s trip to Malaysia was created by TripAdvisor. See another Malaysia slideshow. Create your own stunning free slideshow from your travel photos.

Monday, August 15, 2011

To keep or to go (Part II)

Hi, meet again. As promised I'll continue with the previous topic "To keep or to go".

Remember last time I did mentioned about how vital my student's evaluation to me?. Yup!. Being an educator is my dream since I was a kid. I remembered how I admired my primary school teacher. They had spent their precious time educated me (on these of course included their energy, their patience, money and everything). Still fresh in my mind how my headmaster at that time Cikgu Abdullah(I don't know where he is now.. Ah how i wished i could meet him now and payback his sacrifice towards me at that time. Because of their effort and of course not to leave behind the inspiration from my family especially my late dad, I managed to step my foot at the Mara Junior Science College in Kuala Trengganu. Studied there till SPM, before I could further my study to a much higher level. I always look up and wish to join them being an educator.

However after graduating, I embarked myself in IT field. At first I worked as a programmer then promoted to a system analyst post at one of the higher institution here in Malaysia. Working there really equipped me with tons of IT knowledge. Cosy and conducive working environment. Warm and friendly college and etc. Wow what a flashback. Let me cut this short. After several years working there, I applied for a course called "Kursus Perguruan Lepas Ijazah". To make this mumbling shorter, let me just mentioned, studied for a year and later I was qualified to be a teacher. But my opportunity bestowed by Allah is much more than that. I was accepted to be a lecturer in one of the Teacher's training Institute up north.

Yup. Since then I was so called a Lecturer a.k.a an Educator. The career that I was once dreamed off. And year after year continue, I still hold that title and promised to myself to do the best in me to educate the new generation. Here I am still there.

And, back to the title I was about to tell, after the evaluation process, I was interviewed by the two evaluators mentioned before in the previous blog. So the interviewed went on and on. And after the interview, my memory kept on flashing back what had happened during the interview session. Have you being through this. Some kind of feeling that you felt that you could performed better than what you have done. Yup, that what occurred to me. I don't know what the result would be. But I do hope I will success with flying colours, although deep in my heart I believe, I could do it much better.

And of course this kind of feeling just like a repetition image. It kept on wandering in your mind and you felt so occupied with this feeling and how hard I tried to let it go, it keep on wondering around. Well, as most motivators say, "Just let it out, tell your trusted friends, sooner it will fly away". It so true, I let it out, I expressed what I felt to those I trusted friends out there. And besides, my husband also suggested me to read "The Haikal Seven". Alhamdulillah, thanks to the Most Merciful God, Allah I'm now fully recovered from that uneasy feeling. I am now, back to my normal life, cheerful, enthusiasm like before, ready to fit in again. And my advise to friends out there, if you have problems just let it out, tell to your friend, sometime when you know someone is listening, that is good enough. Never kept any problem to yourself. Share it with your closest people around you. They might understand.

So that's all for the topic to keep or to go. Keep on reading, next time I'll continue with other interesting topic.

Till then....

Friday, August 12, 2011

To keep or to go?

Hi, morning. What a beautiful Friday?. Nice weather, cold and quiet. Quiet because today is a weekend in Kedah. So no sound of school busses or cars. Today I can rest the whole day. My husband is still in the mosque. He cycled to the mosque after our "sahur" meal (an early breakfast during the fasting month) and now 9.06 am, he hasn't come back. Usually he goes there with my stream. But today he cycled there. Before he went out, I smiled and giggled and added "wow, macam cerita P.Ramlee pulak". He used my son's new raleigh, and it' really reminds me of P.Ramlee old and classic movie "Ali Baba Bujang Lapok".
So enough for the induction, let me begin today's blog journal by the above title "To keep or to go". Well, if you looked at the title, you might assumed that it is related to things and old stuff?. If so, your assuming instinct is wrong. So better keep on reading....

Yesterday was a really long day for me. Yesterday also was a big day for me. Yesterday also the day I was evaluated by two appointed evaluator. The story started 2 months back. There was an advertisement by the administration regarding the post of "Pensyarah Cemerlang". My organisation encouraged their staff to grab this opportunity by filling the form and they will filter and submit the candidates who are qualified for the post. Early this month I got the good news, which stated that my submitted form was accepted and I was in the shortlisted to be interviewed and monitored for the purpose of evaluation. And of course I'm not alone. There are also some other shortlisted candidate from my college. So after waiting for several days, yesterday did arrive and I have tried to perform my best during the monitoring and interviewed.
The first chapter of the evaluation begins with a monitoring session by the evaluator towards my teaching and learning practice. My usual class is normally takes 2 hours, but yesterday I needed to cut short my lesson to 1 hour only. So I did some arrangement and prepared a Teaching and Learning Plan for an hour session. Since the topic that I wanted to cover yesterday is more on skill based, so I implemented the demonstration strategy. In my opinion, for a skill topic, I must give the opportunity to my student to acquire the skill by doing. Luckily, most of the student able to access to one pc each and three of them used their own pc. The arrangement of the station in the lab, is like 4 columns with 6 rows each. So that's make 24 of pcs. Since there are three pc's failed to function well, so the student chose to use their own notebook.
Before the session started, my phone beeped twice. Lots of messages. They are messages wishes me luck for that interview and monitoring session. Thank you guys for sending me all the wishing luck messages. It's really boost up my confidence level. Well, by receiving these messages really make me smile and grateful. I'm glad I still have friends out there who really cares and wish me the best. One of the messages is from Kak Yan, "Zah.. all the best 2 u. Kakyn yakin Zah will shine". The other from my organisation deputy director "Selamat dinilai. Saya berdoa semoga berjaya. buktikan ipda mempunyai ramai pensyarah cemerlang IT". From Sumaiyah "Good luck Kak Zah" and several others. Thanks again guys. By receiving messages like that did boost my adrenalin and reduce my nervous. Ha ha you might laughed when reading this, but try to put yourself in my shoe. I'm sure you must have gone thru such an anxiety feeling like this before.
The class went well and smooth at first. However, there arrised several difficulty when I realised that they are two students at the back who were left behind the others. While the others have completed the task, and I'm about to go to the next step, they raised their hands. What should I do?. I can't simply proceed and let them left behind and behind. So I asked the others to proceed to explore the term that I'm gonna use after this. And I even mentioned to them to get the note I posted ealier in our Learning management system. So I strode to their station and try to walk them through. I guessed they must have missed my explanation just now. (I assumed because their stations were at the last rows. So I think is it due to my voice. I believed my voice is loud enough to be heard. And beside, the other guys who sat at the last row able to listen and do the task well. Hmm, as a teacher and a mother, I felt very concern with their performance. I'm very determined to make sure everybody in the class are able to get what I deliver and because of that I'll make sure they both able to do the task. Then I proceeded with the lesson. By the end of the class, I indeed believe most of the student are able to compete the task well.
Finally the class ended and I walked out the door, and leave my student with the evalutors. I guessed they were collecting data from the student. And I'm so sure the were collecting the evaluation data from the student. I wonder what do my student rate me?. Usually I rate them, in their quizzes, in the task accomplishment and etc. But today is vice versa. Their opinion towards me is very vital.

To be continued. (I haven't reach the title yet, so better keep on reading).


Monday, August 8, 2011

Be a Front Seater

Sound so simple but yet, I seldom see, when attending classes, seminar or anything related to it, most of the participants would rather choose the back seat?. I wonder why?. I always remind my student, "come on guys, better be in the front. Coz when your seat near the presenter, you can hear much better, and your view also won't be disrupt by others". Hmm it reminds me of the class I attended during my sophomore year at Arkansas State Univ. Each time when I came to class, I would rather choose the third row in the middle seat. Why? Because at that time I feel so secure being in the middle. Usually my class was organised with chairs of 7 columns and 7 rows. If I sit too near to the Professor, I needed to raise my head coz, most of the Caucasian Lecturers are very high in height. I felt so inconvenience to keep raising my head up to 45 degree to see the lecturer's face. And one other reason is by sitting in the middle I felt like, the lecturer can easily see me too. Not to mentioned, when it comes to Q&A, he will usually point his fingers to the person sitting infront. Ha here come the trick. For me, by sitting in the middle, at least I got the time to think and give an approriate and correct answer?. enough for my own excuses. However I still agree that to be a front seater, can really make you get more information than the others. And it also shown your confidence level. So Dr. Shwartz, I still at your side regarding being the front seater.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Why do I said so!

As promised, I did argue why I didn't agree the confidence level of oneself is how brave you are and how Dr Swartz explained in his book, a navy should jump from a high bridge to the ocean. As I mentioned in my previous blog, I were supposed to jump into the ocean to proved my confidence level, but what i able to do is counting down and followed with "Tolak tuan".
As for me, though I haven't possess the gut to jump to the ocean (I admit, my skill in swimming has become the major barrier why I didn't jump). But still, I try to fight my fear by climbing a high ladder (sort of). he he.


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Photo depicted above taken from by facebook, it's a one life experience by being the participant to the Tunas Samudera.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Eliminate your fear

Complete Chapter 3, and basically in chapter 3 Dr. Swartz suggests the third secret to success which is to "Destroy your fear". Fear is like an enemy to our success, therefore it is very important to take out the fear from oneself. He suggested it well with a story how a navy practise to destroy fear, by jumping from a bridge to the sea. The navy is forced to jump the bridge from a height of several feets to the water. Some of them able to do that and some aren't. This reminded me of my own story when i when to the Tunas Samudera last February. During the training before we are qualified to join the tunas Samudera, we have a 3 days training at Pulau Pangkor. The second day, all the trainees including me, we have to climb an old bridge around 20over feets above sea, and we need to countdown and start jumping to the water. Most of my friends managed to do that easily although with half hearted. Everytime when it reach to my queue, i step backward and lets my friend do so. and when it time to my turn, I embraced my chest with both my hands, with left hand on my right shoulder and right hand on my left shoulder. I couldn't swim (actually this is the skill that I haven't gained. Everytime when my son teach me the lesson, I just could not hold my breath. Not even for 60 seconds. My husband used to teach me too, but i think he must have giving up, coz of my incapability in this skill.
During the jumping, I can see my friends are waiting in the water, just to save me in case I am drowning. Choong and Syikin (the trainers) are both my friends. I know both of them have the life saver certificate, and I'm very sure, they can save me. But I just couldn't jump just like that. So the instructor ask me to countdown like the others. I start counting, "3000, 2000, 1000". And I'm suppposed to jump after final counting 1000, but I couldn't have the gut to jump. why must this be so hard on me.
I started counting again, but this time with "3000, 2000, 1000" and I ended up my counting with "Tolak Tuan", meant that I want the trainer to forcely pushing me down. There you go. Very big splash in the water. Luckily I'm still alive. It not, I couldn't posting my blog here.
The issue here is, I don't think by jumping from a high level place down to the water can be a measurement to our confidence level. But what they said to those who couldn't have the gut to jump from high place down to the water, possess less confidence level". Should I agree with that.
I have my own way of measuring my confidence level. And that's is so true. Continue later...